Some connection

My preceptor shift is over and now I really have to study for next week... if I don't get certain percentage,,, I will screw....

Yesterday, I found the paper with email address on.
I figured out it was from one of my patient.

Well, I poked him twice and missed it but he was so patient with me and gave me email address.
I just sent email and he wrote me back saying I will be a good nurse :)

Also, my preceptor told me so too.

just need more time to get used to it

My second semester, one of my professor asked me if I have any confidence in the patient's room.

I said no

Then she decided to make me come extra clinical days
I was so embarrassed and even cried

Since then, I had been traumatized to be in patient's room.
So I talked to my preceptor about it and try to force myself to be in patient's room as long as possible
also, I researched all meds before I gave them so i can explain... well that one didn't work out well haha
just because i couldn't remember so many at once.

I don't have confidence about myself in general.
I am always scared to death when first meeting people


anyway, i don't know what I wanted to say in this blog haha
Today, I looked up my RN license application for Illinois.
I haven't done anything yet because I want to focus on test next week
sometimes it freaks me out to know I will graduate and be more independent
I am scared of looking for job, going to the place where I don't have any friends and taking test...

So many paper works, homework, school stuff

but I wanna do something fun in Utah with my friends

then, if I get everything done, I wanna visit Japan.
It has been more than two years not to see my family.
If I was American, I would die haha

But now I think it's time to spend time with my family for a little bit
I really need it